Real-Estate Advertising Stoops to New Low

Mini-V Needs a New Agent, and D.R. Horton Needs a New Agency

drhortonTake a break and enjoy some Ad Age:

Oh, Verne, how have you gotten here? We couldn’t get enough of you as Mini-Me. We laughed and cried with you in “The Surreal Life.” And we were glued to your every wince in your infamous sex tape. So where did things go wrong? … Read More

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New Beginnings

Well guess what? The submissions have been rolling in, and as it turns out, in addition to a built-in advertising gene, real estate agents also have a less celebrated talent — business card design. Who knew it? Actually, we knew it all along, but with so many sweet ads to review, we weren’t sure how to find the time to acknowledge it. With a little help from Franklin Covey and a shiny new PDA, we’ve made some room. So, without further ado, the Real”ad”tor team is proud to present … wait for it … The Recard Showcase. There will be no awards, only recognition (and a few choice words from yours truly). So let’s let the fun begin:

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Don’t let her professional appearance fool you, underneath that black sweater vest is an original v-neck “Three Wolf Moon” t-shirt. Howl for me Laurie!

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The worst part is, the dog was the most photogenic.

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Although it’s a bit frightening, Nancy’s message is clear. From buying to selling, she’s with you in mind, body and spirit.

Round one is complete, keep the submissions coming and we’ll keep showcasing the recards. Send them to danaseverson@charter.net.

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Yo Adrian – Buy this damn house.

1112dubongiantAnd in this corner, weighing in at a smooth 15 cribs sold per year, from deep in the projects of Queens, New York – the one – the only – David “The Ultimate Realtor” Dubon! The crowd is on their feet!

The crowd settles down and the fight begins. Round 1: Look at David work that phone, there’s a reason why he remains undefeated. He’s coming in for his first move … ouch … he threw the “If Size Matters … Then Look No Further”, that’s going to sting. Here he comes again, this time with “Knock-out Service and Results”. He’s relentless. Folks, this could be the win — “MTV Cribs comes to Queens” … K.O..

Ladies and Gentleman, by knock-out in the first round, the yet to be defeated and first-time gold Real”ad”tor nominated champion, David “The Ultimate Realtor” Dubon.

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Giving Thanks to the Advertising Gods

doyle_billboard-11Brace yourself folks, they’ve done it yet again! This is becoming so unfair that I’m considering breaking the competition into teirs of double A, triple A and the majors. Clearly, Goliath has some deep pockets and it appears that they’re stealing the best creative talent in the industry by offering the promise of Real”ad”tor awards and fresh corn on the cob. Does that sound like any pin stripe baseball team that you know?

They did they work, so it’s only fair that I give them the review. Let’s just get the obvious out of the way, it’s platinum. Duh.

The Pilgrims outfits are adorable. The painted red faces are offensive, but brilliant. The emotionless expressions depress me, but tell the story. The Native American wardrobes (along with wigs) look 100% authentic. And, the headline is heartfelt, yet persuasive. There! I love it, alright? Are you happy D&D? Now go put crappy ad together so we can all get a good night sleep knowing that you’re human.

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How the (Mid)west was Won

Another adage.com installment:

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Howdy folks! Do you recognize this herd of law protecting gunslingers? I’ll give you a little hint. They don’t headline in Branson, Missouri and they weren’t extras in Blazing Saddles (although they display the same knack for humor as Mel Brooks). Give up? Please give up, cause I’m just dying to give you the answer.  Read More

Big Announcement! And, Good Deed For The Day

Alright, just a couple quick pieces of house cleaning:

First, we get that not everyone has what it takes to develop a righteous real estate ad, and that’s ok. That’s why we’ve decided to reduce the cost of entry (so-to-speak). Alright, big announcement time, where the hell is “Rich the Realtor” with those clapping drumsticks? Anyway … we’re happy to announce that we are nowbcard accepting business card submissions for an all new category of awards. Details are still a bit fuzzy, but, what I can tell you is that we expect an extremely high level of creativity. Please see our lovely Orlando princess to get an idea of what we consider acceptable. BTW: Although she’s able to stand on calm waters without breaking a sweat, Jennifer is terrified of making eye contact with the flash of the camera. (JENNIFER! CLICK, CLICK … Sorry, I’m only playing with you). The team of Real”ad”tor judges are standing by, so send them, NOW.

One last item to cover before we skedaddle. While rummaging through some old files this week, we came JOETTA RUSSO - VIRGINIA COOK REALTORSacross an ad with an exorbitant amount of potential. Rather than write Mrs. Russo off, we thought we spit out a few quick suggestions and see if she has the goods to be an All-American Real”ad”tor. After all, these are our goals, and as she states, they’re now her priorities. We’re going to go quick dear, so you may want to take abbreviated notes:

  • Maybe try a hint of gray, just to add some contrast.
  • Consider incorporating a poodle into your photo.
  • Quadruple the point size of your accomplishments. In fact, to make more room for your achievements, you may want to let your hair down.
  • You need a pun. Try this one on for size: “Call me when your up Pit(man) Creek”. That one’s free. Run with it.
  • And finally … try tinted lenses. It would just look cool!

Good luck and Godspeed.

Rich the Recording Artist

Call me old fashion, but when it comes advertising, nothing beats a freshly-painted pun on a bus bench, grossly-enlarged portraits on a billboard and the “Screw it, it’s already at the printer” typos on the printed page. So, needless to say, when Rich Fravel (yes, the Rich from “Rich the Realtor” fame) sent me his YouTube video, I was less than enthused. Against my better judgment, I gave in and hit the play button. With my preconceived judgment meter already set to lame, it was going to take a minor miracle to get me stimulated. I must admit, as soon as I heard those drum sticks clapping together, I knew I was in for a treat.

This catchy little tune with it’s psychedelic backdrop had me not only tapping my toes, but also simultaneously reaching for my hookah pipe and bag of ganja (the medicinal kind of course). After Rich and his record label (no one could have pulled this off as an independent) had me whistling the chorus all afternoon, I couldn’t help but find myself at iTunes looking for additional tracks. Much to my surprise, it looks like he is in fact an Indy artist (appearing to make money as a real-estate agent on the side) and has yet to sign with a major label (Sony, Warner, Universal? You catching what I’m throwing at you?). That said, it appears that with his Vespa, sporty shades and magic lock-box, Rich is doing just fine on his own. And, just to make life a little bit sweeter, we’ll be presenting him with a Platinum nomination at the 2010 VMA’s. DEE-lux!

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A Not-So-Great Moment in Real-Estate Advertising

A break in the action, compliments of Adage.com:

If you were fortunate enough to catch an episode of the extremely entertaining (hehe) Bravo series “Million Dollar Listing,” you should have a general sense for the stereotypical image that Hollywood has established for real-estate agents in the City of Angels. If you buy into the hype (like I do), then you shouldn’t be the least bit surprised when you see this billboard for one of L.A.’s finest, Peter Klaven … Read More

Rollin’ with the homies

doyle_billboard-8Let me start by saying congratulations! Not to the Doyle and Devoe team (they already know how fortunate they are and we’ll get to them in a minute) but rather, to the lovely followers of the Real”ad”tor Awards. You, my fan faithfuls, are becoming witness to an unprecedented back-to-back sweep of platinum nominated ads by the same real-estate team. It’s an incredible feat to say the least! I’ll be honest, I’ve spent many nights imaging what I would say if I were alive to witness this modern day miracle. Now, as we’re in the moment, I’m at a loss for words. I think it’s probably due in large part to the range of the emotions I feel – delight, pride, jealousy, love, you name it. Once the tears have dried, hopefully we can all embrace the significance of this historic occasion.

Doyle and Dovoe, what can I say? When you’ve got it, you’ve got it. And, your timing was impeccable. Looking at your ad, I’m reminded of the recent battle of Lance Armstrong and the rest of the American cyclists in the 2009 Tour de France. Unfortunately, neither Armstrong nor his comrades took home the first place purse of over $3.5 million, however, had they had access to the gear you guys are sporting (tandems, training wheels, pegs, etc.), I feel confident that the results would have been different. Regardless, you guys take top prize with us (that’s another platinum nomination, this time with matching platinum bike shirts).

Before I dust off my Schwin 10-speed, throw your winnings in my wicker basket and join you guys for a stroll, I’ll need a urine sample from all of you. Sorry, just need to make sure you’re playing by the rules.

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